Tuesday, May 12, 2015

An Open Letter to My Wife, re: Mad Max: Fury Road

Hi Honey,

We need to see Mad Max: Fury Road this weekend. Now, I know you aren’t excited about it, but I’m sure that’s just because you haven’t read up on it yet. Allow me to drop some wisdom. Let's start with our hero.

Look at this photo. Look at it. Isn’t that the Baddest Dude to ever walk Australia?

mad max fury road poster
I got your crosswalk RIGHT HERE.

No, Seriously, This Guy. Effed up knee? Doesn’t matter. He’s got a sawed-off shotgun and a wrench. And a dog. Know what the dog’s name is? No one does. Because he’s too badass to name. Also, it’s scientific fact that Blue Heelers are nature’s most hardcore dog.

mad max mel gibson
As seen on South Park

What, that’s not enough? How about the talented artists making this movie.

So Many Award Winners. Academy Award winning director George Miller, Academy Award winner Charlize Theron, four-time MTV Movie Award nominee Tom Hardy, Teen Choice Award winner Nicholas Hoult, and daughter of Grammy Award winner Lenny Kravitz, Zoe Kravitz. How can you go wrong with such a talented ensemble?

lenny kravitz dreads
"Starring the fruit of my dreads..."

Directorial Firepower. The director of Mad Max: Fury Road also directed cinematic classics such as Mad Max, The Road Warrior, Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, and Babe: Pig in the City.

babe pig in the city thunderdome
oink oink who runs bartertown oink

Still no? Let me tell you about Mad Max's accomplishments. 

Mad Max Survived Thunderdome. Have you stared down Storm from the X-Men and won? Mad Max has.

tina turner thunderdome aunty entity
Nah, for real, Tina Turner is a national treasure

He's Got a Soundtrack. Storm even produced a song for Mad Max. Only James Bond has more swagger.



He's a National Hero. Australians recently voted Mad Max as their greatest hero, beating out Steve Irwin. I don’t have a source to cite for that, but it’s probably true.


steve irwin crocodile hunter
"Crikey, Sarah, go see Mad Max: Fury Road!"

Okay, and if all that somehow doesn’t convince you, lemme introduce you to DAT TRAILER.


Just let me know if you whether you want our tickets for Saturday or Sunday.

Love you sweetie,

Your Husband

3 comments:

  1. Dear sweetheart,

    No.

    Love,
    Your Wife

    ReplyDelete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  3. You totes have to go! We went last night and it was fabulous!

    PS sorry about previous post, my html skills need work!

    ReplyDelete